Well, we had Jack and Vivi again last night. I really have sympathy for all of you moms out there. Especially single moms - since the husband was out of town and I had them all to myself!So, you know how all your life you hear these "parental sayings" that you swear up and down you will never say to your children? Things like "because I said so" and "well if (blank) jumped off a bridge would you do it too" and such? (I long ago STOPPED saying I would never do something - when it comes to parenthood - which I have not experienced yet.) But last night I found myself ALMOST using one of those stupid little sayings, here is what happened:
So, I'm in the living room changing Jack's dirty diaper while Vivi is in the bath tub. Since she is 4 now, I don't feel too bad about leaving her alone for spans of time (I feel pretty confident that she won't drown in 3 inches of water at this point). Vivi keeps yelling for me to come to the bathroom - and I keep saying I can't until I finish changing Jack's diaper (which is like trying to hold down a Mexican Jumping Bean - that is covered in poo). She keeps calling me...I keep putting her off. Then all is quiet for a few minutes (uh oh). So I start walking to the bathroom and notice how strong her strawberry shampoo smells. I have already washed her hair so I assume it is just the lingering smell of the suds we rinsed out previously (you parent experts are saying "what and idiot").
When I round the corner into the bathroom she quickly says
"NOTHING!!!.....What?"
Then this blinding thought of "oh CRAP what did she do??!!" shoots through my mind. I also notice that the strawberry smell is almost sickening-ly strong and the shampoo bottle is floating in the water.
Then I notice that the water is pink...and full of pink bubbles...and then I realize what she has done.
"Did you pour all of your shampoo into the water?"
"Yes"
"Why did you do that?"
"I don't know"
Okay, so here it is...the "parental saying" I so badly wanted to use but didn't:
"Do you know how many kids in Ethiopia would love to be able use strawberry shampoo and now you just wasted your whole bottle!"
But I just told her to get out of the tub and dry off - no need to wash off with soap since she was swimming in it.
All those poor Ethiopian children...no food...no strawberry shampoo...
4 comments:
Parental tip as my kids are grandios shampoo users/wasters: I only give them the little bottles from hotels. Wendell travels so much and collects from all his hotels, so SOMEONE has to use them! I've experienced TOO many brand-new bottles of shampoo "floating" in bathwater!! At least they're "wasting" something that was somewhat "free"! And actually, I think they tend to go a lot farther since they're so small, fit their hands better and you never know if anyone is going to heed the call when you realize you need a new bottle after your hair is already wet!
"...sympathy for all you moms out there"? Excuse me? Some dads have bath duty, don't ya know! Speaking of duty, ever had bath doody duty?
The other day G decided to take a shower with D. By the time they got out the brand new bottle of head to toe was completely empty! Big Brother was oblivious and G was slimy with soap!
Oh, I remember you having bath duty when the kids were little! It was one thing you did to keep your wife sane!
And yes, I've yanked a kid out of the tub because of poo floating in the water! YUCK! D only once - G at least half a dozen times! And that's worse because then 2 kids have to be cleaned of all poo germs!
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