Thursday, August 05, 2010

My Heart... and Glorious things...

I like to write. I am not the world's greatest writer by any means, just mediocre at best. However, I often times find that I am much better at expressing myself through written word. It takes my mind too long to process what I want to say if I am just speaking off the cuff, writing allows me time to think things through, and to say it more accurately. In all honesty I should probably write more often and speak less.

Back in January when we lost our baby would have been a good time to have started writing, for example. I find myself now, six months later, realizing that my heart was impacted much more than I let myself think it would be. I realized a few weeks ago that we were rapidly approaching the due date of our lost child. At that time it hit me like a ton of bricks how much I had gradually shut down parts of myself as I secretly mourned the loss of my baby. For some reason I tried to convince myself that it shouldn't be such a big deal, I was only 12 weeks pregnant, it was just a miscarriage. And for some, those may be their honest feelings... but it wasn't for me... I was lying to myself.

I know that through this time God has been working on my heart... in many, many ways. Too many to mention here. But I have come to truly realize how precious life is... how beautifully and wonderfully we have been created by our Maker. Because of my miscarriage, my eyes have been opened to a whole new world... though I wish, at times, they hadn't. Through a long and drawn out process of "coincidences" my eyes have been opened to the suffering of children all around me. The suffering of orphans. And in particular, orphans in Eastern Europe.

I would give anything to be sitting here holding my newborn baby as I type this... I would almost rather be wrapped up in nursing schedules and the chaos of three children than to have a burden on my heart for children around the world that are thrown away by their families. My baby, you see, was "broken", incompatible with life. His little body could not survive or thrive no matter how much I would have done to make it so. But right at this very moment somewhere in the world someone is making the decision to terminate a pregnancy, or give their child away to an orphanage because their baby, too, is "broken."

In fact, in most Eastern European countries "broken" children are a burden... not to be kept or raised. Broken, to them, can mean diseased (Down Syndrome, HIV, HEP C, etc), disabled (cerebral palsy, dwarfism, arthrogryposis), deformed (cleft palate). They are to be given away to an orphanage where they will typically get by for their first 4-5 years... malnourished, unloved and lagging behind developmentally. But by their 5th birthday they will be sent to a mental institution... with the mentally insane. There they will live in a crib... with no toys... no school... little to no medical care... no mother or father to love them... with nobody to answer their cries... all alone... until they die. And the real kicker is that the majority of them will die within the first year due to abuse and neglect. And by majority, I mean over 90%.

More than 90% will die within the first year from abuse and neglect. Did you catch that?

I weep for these children. I look at their pictures and see their precious faces and feel sick that they are suffering away, day after day, with nobody to love them. I look at my own children and imagine how tragically different their lives would be if they were orphans. I want to bring all of them home.

What strikes me the most is that GOD made them this way. He had a purpose for their lives and He knew exactly what He was doing. He makes all of us in His image. Who are we to say they are less worthy, than we are, to be loved? To be held and comforted? To have a family? What makes any of us believe that we are better than these precious children just because we are "normal"?

Normal... what does that even mean?

The David Crowder Band has a song Everything Glorious which says:

You make everything glorious
And I am Yours
What does that make me?

My eyes are small but they have seen
the beauty of enormous things

Which leads me to believe
there's light enough to see that

You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours


These children are glorious. All of God's creations are glorious. And He created these children with love. They are, in fact, beautifully and wonderfully made despite the stigma placed on them by society.

Not everyone is in a place where adoption is an option for them. Then again, there are so many families out there that want so badly to adopt, but don't have the funds. There are so many kids out there that just need a family to love them.

So here is my point... what can you do to help them? Could you spare a little money to help one of these children find a home? Could you answer the call to bring one into your own home? Please start with a visit to this site, Reece's Rainbow, and pray about a way that you could help some of these children. Helping one of them would in fact be saving a life... literally.

They are glorious.

We are all glorious to God.

4 comments:

JAR said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JAR said...

No matter how hard it gets, I cannot imagine life without Hope. Yes, God made each of these special children perfect, because they, too, are made "in His image"! The moms in our special needs support group say this often to each other. One night, I started our meeting with that very song. . . that's exactly what the song speaks to my heart, too! If only people would realize that these children bless us far more than we could EVER bless them!

Anonymous said...

Beautifully written..love you!

Suzann Soliz said...

What a beautiful way to look at this~ it has given my heart a little bit of piece. With time the ache will ease- and as you know God knows what is best. Hugs!